I am still not prepared to write about my vacation, I hardly even discuss it in person. I am selfishly holding onto the memories as if sharing them will cause them to slip away from me. Soon, though, I promise to share my adventure with the world.
As you can see from the title this post will be a New Years post. Mostly a year in review. I will not bother with resolutions, as I find them pointless. I already have life goals for myself and I try to improve myself every single day so creating specific rules for myself in 2015 doesn’t seem worth it. Every year that I try resolutions I always feel disappointed with myself the first time I trip up. That general disappointment can skew your senses and determination throughout the year and I don’t need that kind of negativity.
So 2014 – This year has exemplified for me the highest of high and the lowest of lows. Life is indeed a roller coaster and some periods of our lives show us this more than others. This year started with a bang, but not the good kind. Within the first two weeks of January I had the flu, my dad was hospitalized and my great Aunt broke her hip. Toward the end of the month things had not gotten any better. I lost a dear friend at the end of the month which had a very serious affect on my day to day life. The day after Paul’s untimely demise I also lost my great aunt who was in the hospital recovering from hip replacement surgery.
The year progressed and I lost another friend and aunt in October. My grandfather was diagnosed with cancer over the summer. There was a lot of sadness. I remember every second of it. There was also a lot of stress. In September I lost my job, which I don’t necessarily count as a bad thing. I hated my job and had actually already given them notice that I planned on leaving. Their response to fire me much sooner than expected did add a sufficient amount of stress to life though.
Stress. That was the overarching theme to the year for me. Most of this was attributed to planning my wedding, which has been one of the most stressful things I have ever done. Every event that happened on top of this only made it so much worse. There were moments where I felt as though my life was collapsing in around me. I have said before that I have grown to appreciate sadness and sorrow. Without these emotions we would be unable to truly appreciate happiness. The high points of life would mean very little if we were unable to to gauge them against the low points.
And the high points. My God, there were wonderfully high and happy moments this year. Early in the year I began researching my family tree. I learned so much of my personal history and was even able to connect with long lost family members all over the world. It was so incredibly enriching and fulfilling. Being able to share life events and maintain contact with people who share my roots and blood is unbelievable. Being able to to have people in my life whom I didn’t even know existed last year. There are no words for the way the feels. It wasn’t just long lost family I was able to connect with either. Between the wedding and my brother graduating I was able to reconnect with family members I have not seen in ten years or more. That is always nice, everyone catching up as adults and sharing the stories we have all missed.
In June my baby brother graduated high school. It was momentous for me. The bitiest of us closing such a major chapter of his life. He was accepted into his school of choice for the program in sports media. I cried and laughed and was most of all incredibly proud. He is so much younger than me that I felt more like a mama cub watching her baby leave the nest. I can only imagine how my mother felt. Him not being around for the latter part of this year has been hard, but he is doing well and I couldn’t be prouder.
Most of all the happiest event in my life was my wedding in November. The later part of the year was littered with wedding events. An eventful and happy Shower in September that although not being something I actually wanted was lovely nonetheless. Plus there was the Bachelorette. A ton of fun with my girls in Atlantic City. Everything leading up to the happiest day of my life when I got to marry the man of my dreams. We weren’t able to leave immediately for our dream honeymoon because of our super eventful November. There were three surprise parties and the usual holiday festivities. So to top off our year we left for Italy in December and returned immediately before Christmas. To further the marital love, Daisy got engaged in August and asked me to be her maid of honor, so I get to reel in the love a little longer. Though with a quarter of the stress.
As I said, this year has been nothing short of eventful. I cannot wait to see what 2015 brings though I do hope that the ups and downs aren’t quite as steep. I hope to enjoy our first year married and maybe buy a home. I hope to get back to work, hopefully in a field I enjoy. I hope many things for the future, most of all I hope to stay positive and only continue to improve.
For all of you I wish the same – Absolute happiness and positivity. I wish that you realize your dreams, follow them and see them come to fruition.